I HAD ALREADY DIED

We are all dying. People who are battling health issues, are just more aware of this…

I get asked all the time, how do I deal with knowing I have an incurable illness & I could die. This always perplexes me. No one knows when they’ll die. We do know that we will all die.

I actually find myself focusing more on living right now, in this moment, than I do on dying. A lot of healthy people seem to waste a lot of time, having a lack of appreciation for every minute. Whereas people with an illness, treasure every second and they are keenly aware that death comes for us all.

Time is our greatest treasure. Protect it.

I’m a firm believer in the idea that we are only given so many minutes to live. How many minutes we will get is on God. But how we spend those minutes is on us. I have always told my kids, “Don’t waste your minutes”. I pretty much say it to everyone now.

I have no idea if I’ll live an average lifespan or if my life will be cut short due to my illness. None of us know these things. Since I got sick, I’ve been trying to live in the present, to count my blessings, to notice things more & to never take my minutes for granted.

I choose to live.

A couple years after my diagnosis, I thought to myself, my grandchildren will never know me healthy. That new people I meet, are meeting a completely different “me”, from the one I used to be. It was in that moment that I realized I had already died. The old me was gone. This is the me I’m stuck with, the me born out of illness. It was up to me to shape who I was to become.

I’ve had to accept many things. Death being one of them. I will fight to get as much enjoyment & meaning out of my life as I can. I will live, love, learn & laugh fiercely. I will do my best to NOT waste one minute.

Imagine a world where we all realize we are dying. Where we choose life & never waste our minutes.

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